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《燃情克利夫兰》上季提要
Last season on Hot in Cleveland...
你觉得如何 小甜心
How "bout it, sweet cheeks?
想去兜兜风吗
Want to hit the town?
你居然对我有兴趣
You"re interested in me?
我这二十年来
Haven"t you noticed
孜孜不倦地勾搭你
that I"ve been hitting on you relentlessly
你都没有注意到吗
for the past 20 years?
至少你现在抱得帅哥归了啊
Well, at least you got a new boyfriend.
别吵吵
Hold it down.
他在楼上睡觉呢
He"s asleep upstairs.
我的老天啊
Oh, my God.
我的亲娘喂
Oh, my God.
我的七舅老爷诶
Oh, my God!
我的天啊
Oh, my God.
天上掉下个小宝宝
We have a baby.
我们该怎么办
What do we do?
玛格丽塔[女子名 鸡尾酒名]
Margarita.
好主意 我去调一扎
Great idea. I"ll make a pitcher.
这时候喝酒 开玩笑吗
Drinking now? Really?
其实 我刚刚是在喊我们家保姆啦
Actually, Margarita was my children"s nanny.
可能是因为一见到这孩子
I guess when I saw the baby,
我的母性本能就瞬间爆发了
my maternal instinct just kicked in.
什么样的混帐会把婴儿扔在台阶上啊
What kind of a monster leaves a baby on a doorstep?
那个混帐就是我 妈
That would be me, mom.
欧文
Owen!
抱歉 东西太多 只好分两次去拿
Sorry, I had so much stuff I made two trips.
所以说 这是你的娃
So this is your baby?
所以我有个孙...
I have a grand...
子
Son.
我的妈呀
Oh, my God.
我的妈呀
Oh, my God!
大家听着 这是我的孙子
Everybody, this is my grandson!
欧文 你干嘛不早告诉我
Owen, why didn"t you tell me?
上次咱们聊天 关于你的大事
The last time we spoke, the big news in your life
还是你不吃谷蛋白呢
was that you"d given up gluten.
真是明智之举啊
Oh, good for you!
几周前 跟我有过一夜情的姑娘
A few weeks ago, a girl that I had a one-night stand with
突然抱着个婴儿出现在我家门口
suddenly showed up on my doorstep with a baby.
她说她没有能力抚养
She said that she couldn"t take care of him.
所以要么我来养 要么把威尔伯送去领养
So it was either me, or put Wilbur up for adoption.
我需要时间考虑考虑
I needed time to think.
我想你还是先考虑考虑
The time to think
要不要给他取名威尔伯吧
was before you named him Wilbur.
真抱歉把这个烂摊子带到你这儿
I am so sorry to dump this on you,
但我养父母都去世了
but now that my folks are gone,
我不知道还能找谁求助
I didn"t know who else to turn to.
亲爱的 我很乐意帮你
Oh, honey, I"m glad you came to me.
别啊 他都哭了
Oh, no, he"s crying.
我的女神啊 有个婴儿[Cher为美国同志女神]
Holy Cher, it"s a baby!
孩子不哭了
He stopped crying!
当然不会哭了
Of course he did.
我的声场能抚慰宝宝的心灵
My voice is very soothing to babies.
如同一支甜美的摇篮曲
It"s like a lullaby.
皮埃尔 你穿着我的真丝睡袍呢
Pierre, that"s my good silk robe.
我知道 我自己家里也有件差不多的
Oh, I know--I"ve got one at home just like it.
这是你男朋友吗
Um, is he your boyfriend?
饶了我吧 不是
Oh, good god, no.
是人家的男朋友啦
He"s my boyfriend.
我喜欢威尔伯这个名字
I love the name Wilbur.
听起来强壮而独特
I think it"s strong and unique.
再问下 欧文姓什么来着
What"s Owen"s last name again?
伯尔
Burr.
所以孩子叫威尔伯·伯尔
So...Wilbur Burr.
你的五分钟到啦
Your five minutes are up.
轮到我抱了
My turn to hold the baby.
你好哇
Hello.
好好闻的婴儿香
Mmm, new baby smell.
往事历历在目啊
Brings me right back.
上一秒 年轻的自己抱着孩子
One minute you"re young, holding your babies,
然后下一秒
then poof--
他们就独立高飞了 你也就顾影自怜了
They"re on their own, and suddenly so are you.
时间过得可真快啊
Time just goes by so quickly.
好了 把他交出来
All right, hand him over.
不要 时间还没到呢
No, the timer didn"t go off.
是没到 但这孩子让你变得
Yes, but new baby smell is turning you
道理连篇 多愁善感
into philosophical, red wine Melanie
而不是愉悦开朗 活泼乐观了
instead of cheerful, white wine Melanie.
抱歉 看到婴儿就会想到人生
Sorry. Babies make me think about life.
我最近看完了所有已经播出的"傲骨贤妻"
Now that I"m all caught up on The Good Wife,
正需要接受新的挑战呢
I could use another challenge.
感觉真不错
This is nice.
作为事业型母亲 我以前很少有机会这样
You know, being a working mom, I didn"t get to do this enough.
你好啊 威尔
Hey, Will.
你觉得欧文会怎么做
So what do you think owen"s going to do?
这是他的决定
Well, it"s his decision,
不管如何 我都会支持他
and I"ll support whatever he chooses.
但说真的 我希望他留下这孩子
Oh, but, god, I hope he keeps him.
三十年前 我送走了一个这样的小男孩
30 years ago, I gave away a little boy just like him.
我无法再一次承受那种伤痛了
And I can"t bear to go through that again.
叮 到我了
Ding! My turn.
要是让他看到你这个做奶奶的
You know, you could make his decision a lot easier
会给他足够的帮助 我想他这个决定
by showing him that he"ll get plenty of help
就更好做了
from the perfect grandmother.
或者是奶奶们
Or grandmothers.
以及一位年轻得惊人的阿姨
And one surprisingly youthful aunt.
灯光打得好的话 也可以算是大姐姐
Or older sister, in the right lighting.
其实你说得很对
You know, you"re right.
不是说你自诩大姐姐这事
Not about the older sister thing.
那实在是胡扯
That"s just insane.
但你之前说的那一点可行
But the idea could work.
我要做一个完美奶奶
I"m gonna be the perfect grandmother.
你可以从夜间喂奶做起
And you can start by taking all the night feedings.
夜间喂奶 那是什么东西
Night feedings? What are those?
你关了婴儿房的监视器后
Once you turn off the baby monitor,
他们就会一觉睡到天亮啊
they sleep till morning.
可不许偷看哦
Not a peep.
我的天啊
Man, oh, Manilow.
孩子哪儿去了
Where"s the baby?
天呐 威尔伯呢
Oh, my god, where"s Wilbur?
孩子能去哪儿啊
Where could he be?
也许被狗吃了
Maybe the dingo ate it.
猜猜谁刚刚获得伍迪·艾伦电影里的角色了
Guess who just got a part in a Woody Allen movie?
谢天谢地 孩子跟维多利亚一起呢
Oh, thank god, he"s with victoria.
你应该知会我们一声的
You should"ve told us.
好吧 我来揭晓
All right, I"ll answer.
我拿到了伍迪·艾伦的一个电影角色
I got a part in a woody allen movie.
他还好吗 你喂他了吗
Is he okay? Did you feed him?
他还好
Oh, he"s fine.
他已经睡了一小时了
He"s been napping for the last hour.
我要去美容院了
Well, I"ve got to get to the salon.
那个骚妇 沃巴姆夫人
That saucy minx, Mrs. Walbaum,
非要我给她做头发[shag也有性交之意]
is begging me to give her a shag.
你最好说的是理发
You better mean the haircut.
别憎恶造型师 宝贝
Don"t hate the stylist, baby.
恨就恨这个社会
Hate the game.
我今晚能见到你吗
Will I see you tonight?
今晚啊
Oh, tonight...
我不确定
You know, I"m not sure.
我会给你打电话
I"ll call you.
他那是拒绝我吗
Was that a brush-off?
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