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第一次辞职时，给领导写的辞职信：如果一个工作，占据了我所有寻找妹子的时间，又不能提供给我把妹的资金，我还做它干什么！
When I resigned for the first time, I wrote in my resignation letter: if a job occupies all my time looking for sister paper and can"t provide me with the funds to pick up my sister, what else should I do!
炸鸡如此多娇，引无数少女肥了腰。
Fried chicken is so delicate that countless girls have fattened their waist.
你不喜欢我没有关系，毕竟不是人人都有好品味。
It doesn"t matter if you don"t like me. After all, not everyone has good taste.
他们说在喜欢的人面前会变笨，难道我喜欢上作业了？不可能啊。
They say they will become stupid in front of the people they like. Do I like homework? No way.
没有女朋友是什么感受？有一种怀才不遇的感觉。
What"s it like to have no girlfriend? There is a sense of underachievement.
天下没有免费的午餐，所以我一般都睡到下午起床。
There is no free lunch, so I usually sleep until the afternoon.
我一直相信自己是天使，回不去天堂也不过是体重的原因
I have always believed that I am an angel. It"s just my weight that I can"t go back to heaven
最近很多朋友说我胖了，这不禁让我陷入思考.我怎么会有这么多朋友？我的朋友是不是太多了？
Recently, many friends say I"m fat, which makes me think. How can I have so many friends? Do I have too many friends?
“你变了，变得不像以前那么简单了”“怎么啦？”“别闹，我在和作业说话”
"You"ve changed. It"s not as simple as before" "what"s the matter?"“ Come on, I"m talking to my homework. "
如果你的女朋友太美 你怕她沾花惹草怎么办 换我也没用 我更美。
If your girlfriend is too beautiful, what do you do if you are afraid of her flirting? It"s no use for me. I"m more beautiful.
刚才有只蚊子得到了我给它的一生中最后的掌声。
Just now a mosquito got the last applause of my life.
我不会眼睁睁地看着你往火坑里跳，因为你跳的时候我会闭上眼睛的。
I won"t watch you jump into the fire, because I"ll close my eyes when you jump.
减肥始终是人生第二大事，第一大事是吃好喝好！
Weight loss is always the second major event in life. The first major event is to eat and drink well!
那晚，我在阳台抽烟，风抽一半我抽一半，我没和风计较，或许风也有烦恼，可转念一想，风凭什么抽我的烟，于是我开始抽风。
That night, I smoked on the balcony. I smoked half of the wind. I didn"t care about the wind. Maybe the wind also had troubles, but I thought about why the wind smoked my cigarette, so I began to smoke.
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