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1、刚刚我摔了一跤，不是地震，大家不要惊慌。
I fell down just now. It"s not an earthquake. Don"t panic.
2、别人赌气是不吃饭，你一赌气就是吃两碗饭。
When others are angry, they don"t eat. If you are angry, you will eat two bowls of rice.
3、人家脑子起码还会短路，可你连电源都没有。
Other people"s brains will at least be short circuited, but you don"t even have power.
4、比一个人吃火锅更寂寞的是，一个人没钱吃火锅。
More lonely than eating hot pot alone is that one has no money to eat hot pot.
5、今天去剪头发，老板问我剪什么样，我说剪个能找到男朋友的，他居然问我是不是来砸场子的。
Today, I went to have my hair cut. My boss asked me what hairstyle to cut. I said I could find my boyfriend"s hairstyle, but he actually asked me if I was here to smash the venue.
6、终于突破了事业的瓶颈，却发现还有瓶盖。
I finally broke through the bottleneck of my career, only to find that there are bottle caps.
7、你们每次骂别人时，有没有考虑对方的感受，反正我是有，尽量不用方言，怕对方听不懂。
Every time you scold others, do you consider their feelings? Anyway, I do, so try not to use dialect, for fear that the other party can"t understand.
8、为什么我想前任你会生气啊？等我和你分手了，我也会想你的啊。
I miss my boyfriend, why are you angry? When I break up with you, I will miss you too!
9、千万不能胖，不然以后穷得去讨饭，都没人信你是乞丐。
Don"t be fat, or you will be too poor to beg, and no one will believe you are a beggar.
10、又到了可以穿男朋友外套的季节，请大家告诉我，穿谁男朋友的外套才不会被打。
It"s time to wear a boyfriend"s coat again. Please tell me whose boyfriend"s coat you wear will not be beaten.
11、王者荣耀太难玩了，打也打不过，骂也骂不过。
The glory of the king is too hard to play, and you can"t beat it or scold it.
12、你生气的时候发火，不生气的时候也发火，你就是一颗火龙果。
You lose your temper when you are angry, and you lose your temper when you are not. You are a pitaya.
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