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一、对于你而言,历史总是惊人的相似,比如:前年,你是单身,去年,你是单身,今年,你还是单身!哈哈哈哈!
For example, the year before last, you were single. Last year, you were single. This year, you are still single! Hahaha!
二、别人可能是笑起来很好看,但是你就厉害了,你是看起来很好笑。
others may be good to laugh, but you are great, you are to look funny.
三、小时候总是忙着可爱、忙着长大,长大后,除了忙着工作、还要忙着相亲、更要忙着护法。
when I was a child was always busy with lovely, busy growing up, grow up, in addition to busy with work, but also busy with blind date, more busy with protection.
四、越长大越明白,人的想法都是会变得,例如我,以前总想着怎么发家致富,后来经过社会的“毒打",我现在只想怎样能够快速脱贫。
the more I grow up, the more I understand that people"s ideas will become. For example, I used to think about how to get rich, and then after the "beating" of the society, I just want to get rid of poverty quickly.
五、别的女人是水做的,温柔,不会乱发脾气,可你就厉害了,你是雪碧做的,得捧着,不能晃,不然很容易炸。
other women are water, gentle, not temper, but you are fierce, you are Sprite do, hold, can not shake, otherwise it is easy to fry.
六、总是有一些人晚上在被窝里下定决心从明天开始改变早起,过自律的生活。然后第二天中午在被窝里刷着手机,再说一句:“擦,明天正式开始”。
There are always those who sit in bed at night determined to change their waking habits and lead a disciplined life starting tomorrow. Then the next day noon in the bed with the mobile phone, say a: "wipe, tomorrow formally start".
七、明明考试是我一个人的事情,可是分数却是爸妈七大姑八大姨以及隔壁老王等等八竿子打不着的人的事。
Obviously, the exam is my own business, but the score is my parents seven aunts eight aunts and the next door Lao Wang and so on eight lines not the people"s business.
八、你知道什么是代沟吗?大概就是你穿着你新买的破洞裤去姥姥家的时候,你姥姥心疼的问你冷不冷,并要拿针给你缝起来的时候。
Do you know what the generation gap is? It"s probably when you go to grandma"s house wearing your new ripped pants and grandma asks you lovingly about your coldness and wants to sew you up with a needle.
九、我劝你们最好选择在中午秀恩爱,知道为什么吗?因为早晚会有报应的。
I advise you to choose at noon show love, you know why? Because sooner or later there will be retribution.
十、有些人安慰起别人的时候一套一套的,可安慰自己的时候只想找根绳子套一套。
Some people comfort others with a set of, can comfort their own time just want to find a rope with a set.
十一、听我的,还在上学的时候,尽量不要学人家早恋,因为你还小,过早地知道自己没有魅力,又矮又挫,会影响考试的。
listen to me, still in school, try not to learn from others puppy love, because you are still small, too early to know that he has no charm, short and bad, will affect the exam.
十二、其实卖萌这种事情也是看脸的,那些长得好看的叫卖萌,而那些长得丑的只能叫装疯卖傻。
In fact, show MOE this kind of thing is also to see the face, those who look good peddling cute, and those who look ugly can only be called play the fool.
十三、以前车马很慢,一生只能爱一个人,而现在就不一样了,网络科技发达,一天能绿五六个人。
Thirteen, before the car horse very slow, life can only love a person, and now is not the same, the network technology developed, a day can green five or six people.
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