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1.损友在国外深造，一天突然想抽烟发现没打火机，但他英语不好，无奈只好跑到前台说：fire……结果对方立马给他个灭火器。
One day, he suddenly wanted to smoke and found that he didn"t have a lighter, but his English was poor, so he had to go to the front desk and say: Fire…… As a result, the other party immediately gave him a fire extinguisher.
2.年纪轻轻，体重倒是不轻。余额不多，想买的倒是不少。
Young and heavy. The balance is not much, but I want to buy a lot.
3.五岁的时候，我的目标是法拉利。二十岁的时候，我的目标是奥迪A6。二十五岁的时候，我的目标是吉利熊猫。现在的目标，能挤上公交车，有个位置坐着听音乐就好。
When I was five, my goal was Ferrari. When I was 20, my goal was the Audi A6. When I was 25 years old, my goal was Geely panda. The goal now is to get on the bus and have a seat to listen to music.
4.你肺活量是多少啊，能把牛B吹这么大。
What"s your vital capacity? Can you blow cow B so big
5.有旳人活着，他已经死了。有的人活着，他早该死了。
Someone is alive, he is dead. Some people live, he should die.
6.不回消息正常，你见过哪个美女不忙的。
It"s normal if you don"t return the news. Which beauty have you met that is not busy
7.我失恋一次我就流一滴眼泪，于是，便有了太平洋。
Once I was lovelorn, I shed a tear, so there was the Pacific Ocean.
8.灯光拉长了我的身影，慢慢的不见了，原来我隐身了。
the light lengthened my figure, slowly disappeared, originally I was invisible.
9.语文=YW=要完，数学=SX=伤心，英语=YY=阴影，物理=WL=完了，化学=HX=寒心，历史=LS=劣势，地理=DL=低了，生物=SW=失望，政治=ZZ=智障，好像有点道理。
Chinese = YW = to finish, mathematics = SX = sad, English = YY = shadow, physics = WL = finished, chemistry = HX = chill, history = LS = weakness, geography = DL = low, biology = SW = disappointed, politics = ZZ = mentally retarded, it seems to make some sense.
10.不用怀疑，我就是你梦中的穷人。
No doubt, I am the poor man in your dream
11.床可以让我依靠，被可以给我拥抱，所以我才那么喜欢睡觉。
Bed can let me rely on, can give me a hug, so I like sleeping so much.
12.人生最大的耻辱是什么？“考试作弊了还不及格”。
What is the biggest shame in life? "Cheating in the exam and failing.".
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