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时间过得真快！转眼间你已经成了一个老人。
How time flies! You"ve become an old man in a blink of an eye.
格言有两种，一种是励志，一种是骂人。
There are two kinds of proverbs, one is inspirational, one is abusive.
世界上有很多无情的人，就像猫饿了想吃老鼠一样。
There are many heartless people in the world, just like the cat wants to eat mice when it is hungry.
很久没有人把牛吹得这么新鲜了。
It"s been a long time since anyone blew a cow this fresh.
分手很无聊，我们可以玩离婚！
Breakups are boring! We can play divorce!
听着，你也会有这一天。
Look, this is gonna happen to you, too.
我不缺爱，但你的离开让我缺少习惯。
I do not lack of love, but you leave me lack of habit.
我觉得吃挂面比什么都方便，因为挂起来就不用吃了。
I think eating noodles is more convenient than anything else, because when you hang them, you don"t have to eat them.
父母忽悠孩子叫教育；孩子忽悠父母叫出轨；互相愚弄叫做代沟。
Parents fool their children into calling them education; Children cheat their parents called cheating; Making fools of each other is called generation gap.
你和我，只是因为你没有强迫，你和我假装纯洁，只是因为你不纯洁。
You and I, just because you are not forced, you and I pretend to be pure, just because you are not pure.
认识你之后，一种智力上的优越感油然而生。
After knowing you, a sense of intellectual superiority arises spontaneously.
我从来不相信分手后我们还能做朋友。
I never believed we could be friends after a breakup.
还没来得及去沾花惹草，就被拉了出来。
I got pulled out before I had a chance to get laid.
没有脸是世界无敌的，就像没有水泥的电线杆。
No face is invincible, like a telephone pole without cement.
当你说想我的时候，我会紧紧地抱着你。
When you say you miss me, I"ll hold you tight.
一个女人一生中一定有几个蓝色的知己.
A woman must have several blue friends in her life.
上帝喜欢看新闻带走迈克华莱士，上帝喜欢音乐和迈克尔杰克逊，上帝喜欢鬼魂和幽灵带走张国荣。
God likes watching the news take away Mike Wallace, God likes music and Michael Jackson, God likes ghosts and ghosts take away Leslie Cheung.
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